It's brimming in a rush leaving me in a drown.

This morning I woke up with a heavy heart. I was trying to recall the dream that brought me to such a bad start but with no luck at all. No, it wasn't waking up at the wrong side of the bed. I am not at the bottom end of my mood. The feeling was different. It was more like waking up after a break up. Or waking up knowing you have nothing good to look forward to for the day. I know I dreamed something last night. It has to be the reason why but I guess all hopes to remember it eluded me the moment I opened my eyes. It was just a dream, though. But the dream fades. the feeling not. 

You know what they say about dreams. You dream what you think of the most. Or what haunts you. Fears. Doubts. Desires. Wish fulfillment. Everything in our unconscious mind. I'm not gonna discuss dreams in the point of view of Psychology cause that would involve jargon not much familiar to all. And complicated, not to mention. All I'm saying is that I never felt this in ages. There are times when I would wonder whether I am still having dreams because the moment I open my eyes from slumber, I don't remember having any. Not even a single one from the several we have every night. This leads me to this: 

"According to Freud, the reason you struggle to remember your dreams, is because the superego is at work. It is doing its work by protecting the conscious mind from disturbing images  and desires conjures by the unconscious (Dream Moods, 2011)."

So does that mean my dreams (or those in my unconscious) is too unpleasant and troubling for me to even remember just one? I may not have recalled what exactly made me feel such but the feeling would precisely speak for itself. I've been thinking too much lately and last night was no exception. I tire my mind (and heart) too much that it came back to me in dreams that are, maybe, too unsettling to be even entertained consciously. Oh well. 

Did I bore you with all these? It's kind of complicated talking about dreams but I find it so interesting and entertaining at the same time. There's just too much complexities going on with our minds and dreams are just proofs to that. This is one of the perks of studying Psychology, you know. You will never ran out of clients, you always have yourself to see. 

*wink xx